It was only the past 24 hours that the sinking feeling of loss effectively penetrated deep in. How would you feel if you were in my shoes? Would you still be able to carry on your ministry the very same way you built it upon? To be frank, I feel like ripping my ministry apart and built it from scratch because of this incident that changed my life. I dont want to regret not doing enough for every person that comes into my midst. I wouldnt say 5 years ago, I did not do my best in following up on him. But I knew that if you placed the present Kenneth you see today back then, perhaps things could have been different.
Youths, Young Adults, you can be cell leaders, connect group leaders, leaders in school or in your workplace, you cant say that you've been there, done that until you have experienced it yourself. I am boldly making this statement because it is true. Up till this event, I must admit I thought that soul-winning was just a lifestyle. Something that should be done. Something that Christians should be passionate about. And now this is what I define soul-winning:
Soul-winning is a call to obedience, a call to faithfulness, a call to compassion, a call to love, a call to patience, a call to servanthood, a call to humility, and finally a call to willingly embrace a lifelong calling.
God has called us to be conversionists, to break down and to restore everything to its orginal purpose, yet for some leaders that I've seen personally for myself add more agendas and conditions for their members to fulfill. What for? Have they lost their soul? People are always people. I remember Pastor Kong saying that we are 2/3 spiritual and 1/3 natural. Oh they can be so vision-minded, go for numbers and all, yes I agree its a great thing to be concerned over numbers, but hold fast to the values that God has placed within the leather-backed book we carry. The just shall live by faith. My cry for everyone of you is to walk in truth.
Easter is about the resurrection. Perhaps after months, you'd probably have given up on the very people you've been trying to get back. Dont wait until the person's face appears in the Orbituary section of the Straits Times before you realise and regret. Start resurrecting broken relationships again.
Broken meaning you initiated the break-up because you deemed that he/she was no longer potential and will never come back.
Broken meaning you start sowing back into his/her life the very seed of life that was placed in yours when you came.
Broken meaning you break that judgemental mindset of yours and start seeing everyone as a potential disciple of Christ.
Broken meaning you die to your old mindset, and start building on the God's values.
I cannot express how much this event has brought tons of revelation upon me, but I will take each revelation as it comes as I rebuild my foundations, beliefs and value systems with regard to minsitry, God, and my personal life.
On a side note before signing off:
X was telling me how great CHC is and how good I am at the guitar. In my heart I commented:
Please. Dont praise the place where I came from, but praise the God who made me.
Is CHC your everything?
Is ministry your everything?
Is connect group your everything?
Is serving your everything?
Is the great praise and worship your everything?
Are your cell group members everything?
Are events everything?
I am sure all these rank somewhere of somewhat importance in your life, and your heartbeat would gladly beat for any of these things in or outside this little list. But friends, let me tell you one last thing:
I would gladly stop my hearbeat for these things just to listen to God's heartbeat and allow God to take all of me in exchange for all of Him. Only then I can say, it is not I, but Christ who lives in me. Love you deep deep G.
And now, the song 'Above All Else' makes so much more sense than before.
I just hope that my friend up there will finally realise what he has missed out over the years.
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