The only reason..

.. that I am blogging at this unearthly hour, (probably 530am in Singapore) is because:

1. I am overly stressed over work.
2. My neighbour (someone on the same floor) is snoring so loudly that I couldnt sleep within half an hour.
3. I am still overly stressed over work.
4. I am scared of the exams. =(
5. I have prayed alongs the lines of "faith casts out all fear" and yet I am still afraid.
6. I need to release faith someway, somehow, somewhat.
7. I need a miracle not to prove to the world that I am somebody, but to tell you that I am a nobody without you.


I guess nobody can fathom how I'm feeling right now, given a mixture of both extreme sides of emotion. In one corner of the wrestling ring is Mr Exams, puffing up his muscles and buldging 8 pack, looking verrryy intimidating, and the other corner is Mr Cant-wait-to-step-back-into-Singapore. With both issues trying to get on top of one another in my brain, it is no wonder nothing I study seems to go in. Funny how blogging allows you to sort things out nicely in your mind. Getting high over something that is so distant does not nullify the impact of current circumstance. It is EXACTLY like ORD. I am sure every single NSF longs for ORD, but yet, all the xiong training dosent get cancelled. And yet they always say, "Think of ORD when you train, it will make you feel better." Im very sure we were all muttering under our breaths, "yeahh right. We have 1 year plus more to go."

In the meantime, I guess the feeling of reaching Singapore cannot be explained in words. After being away for a couple of months, I dont think the full bloom homesick phenomena would kick in yet. After all, like Pauline said before "its only a few months." But then again, looking at the 2009 Academic Year, I'll only have 1 month of break before the second semester in '09 starts. In other words I'll be away for a good 8 to 9 months, with 3-4 weeks break in between. I dont know if I'll be back yet, might be going for Hillsong Conference, which would definitely take up half of the 3-4 week holiday.(plus some sightseeing) So yeah, thats probably I'll experience full blown homesickness.

I'm still quite positive about the coming 2009 year, my sister should be joining me in the second semester and I HOPE she dosent bother me too much esp since its winter. COLD. So I guess I'll have to see how things go then. At the moment I'm scheduled to come back for the 3-4 weeks, so you guys will get to see how much i've grown sideways, but thats the plan for now. Having said so much, I think the best way to put it is, " How should I spend my long holiday so that I wouldnt feel homesick." I'll have my 2009 resolutions up soon I guess, probably after the exams. I wouldnt go into specific events like what happened and stuff, but just to let you guys know that its a stressful time over here, so I'll need all the interceding I can get. =)

Really looking forward to seeing every single one of you again, you'll definitely have more of me (in terms of mass) to love. hahaha. drop me encouraging comments yeah, its good to always hear from you =)


I misss... *takes deep breath* momDADsisLENGKYwayneDIXdomPAULINEjieyunCHRISjacANNAronaldTHEODOREelliotSONGJIEsarahISABELLEjeanetteJOANNEmichelleAILEENsheilaSALLYangelKRYSTLEsophieJOCELINyanghongMYRNAliangweiKWANHANdwayneJINGXUAN.

that was hard. I actually tried, but I didnt make it past isabelle. It dosent mean you're not missed though!